Why Direct Messaging (DM's) Are Not Part Of My Business or Marketing Strategy
One of the key values I live by in business is "don't make yourself more accessible than you really want to be." It sounds simple, but it has some fairly radical implications in practice. And the practice that’s most shocking to some is that I intentionally avoid using Direct Messages for business interactions.
In this article I walk you through how I came to this decision, and what’s happened as a result of it.
— In this article —
Direct Messaging signals direct access
For me, DMs equate to direct access, a privilege I reserve for family, friends, and occasionally private clients.
This might seem counterintuitive, especially given the current culture around online business, where DMs are recommended for everything from cold outreach to service delivery. Most service-based solopreneurs follow this trend, and it's easy to end up feeling obligated to do the same, either in the name of being "heart-centred" or simply because you've been told it's necessary to generate clients.
Play the whole tape through, though, and you start to see what I saw. DMs often require more screen time than you'd expect, much of it spent responding to questions that are already answered on your website. I've had people ask via DM "Can you tell me about what you offer?" — a question they could have answered themselves in about thirty seconds by clicking through to my site.
And even when automation tools like ManyChat are offered as the solution, automated DMs still don't align with how I want to experience myself in business.
Why DMs don't feature in my business model
The thing I wanted most was simplicity. I route all professional communication through email, which I have a dedicated time in my calendar to attend to. That keeps things manageable and contained, simplifies my workflow, respects my time and energy, and gives me more time away from my screen.
I also didn't like what DMs did to my community. When someone responds to a post via a private message rather than in the comments, that conversation disappears from the shared space where it belongs. Comments sections can be genuinely enriching, a place for collective wisdom and shared experience. A DM sidelines all of that.
And then there's the self-leadership piece. The common argument against sending people to a link or a URL is that you should make information as easy as possible to access. But what I've found is that requiring a little more effort, asking someone to visit my website rather than answering their question in a private message, naturally draws in the kind of self-led clients and students I love working with. People who don't need spoon-feeding.
So I changed my social media settings to limit who could reach out to me privately. And what I found was that if someone is genuinely interested in what I offer, they go to my website and proactively find what they're looking for. Then email me if they need to.
How not using DM’s has impacted sales
Stepping away from DMs hasn't hindered my business. If anything, it's become a reason clients choose to work with me. Some have told me directly that my not being accessible via DMs is part of what drew them in. When they see me going against the grain and still running a thriving business, it creates a "I want what she's having" moment. Since limiting my accessibility this way, I've actually seen an increase in buyers.
Nobody wants to be a 24/7 help desk, especially when it isn't actually necessary.
Take a moment to consider where you might be making yourself more accessible than you actually want to be. And whether pulling back might not cost you what you think it will.
Danielle Gardner
The Quiet Marketer
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